Sleep Secure Nights

Category: Bedwetting Basics

  • Bedwetting by Age: What’s Normal, What’s Not, and What to Do

    Bedwetting by Age: What’s Normal, What’s Not, and What to Do

    Infographic titled ‘Bedwetting by Age’ showing five age categories with descriptions. • Ages 3–5: ‘Common, not usually a concern’ with illustration of a sleeping child. • Ages 6–7: ‘Many still wet at night, some develop dryness’ with sleeping child. • Ages 8–10: ‘Around 10–15% may still wet, watch patterns’ with sleeping child. • Ages 11–13: ‘Bedwetting more likely to be chronic.’ • Ages 14–18: ‘Typically indicates underlying issue.’ Includes a horizontal arrow showing progression of age left to right
    A visual guide to typical bedwetting patterns across childhood and adolescence, from ages 3 to 18.

    Bedwetting—also known as nocturnal enuresis—is a deeply personal and often frustrating experience for families. Whether your child is 5 or 15, the emotions surrounding night-time accidents can range from confusion and guilt to embarrassment and worry. As a parent, you want to know: Is this normal? Should I be worried? What can I do to help?

    In this guide, we’ll break down bedwetting by age, explain what’s considered normal development, and walk you through practical, compassionate steps to support your child—no matter their age or stage.

    Understanding Bedwetting: A Developmental Overview

    Bedwetting is involuntary urination during sleep. While frustrating, it’s important to understand that it is not a behavioral issue, and it is rarely something a child can simply “control.”

    Here’s what every parent should know:

    • Bedwetting is very common in early childhood.
    • Most children grow out of it naturally—but not all do.
    • For some older children and teens, bedwetting persists due to genetics, sleep patterns, bladder development, or other medical factors.

    Let’s explore what’s typical at each age—and when you might want to take action.

    Bedwetting in Toddlers and Preschoolers (Ages 2–5)

    ✅ What’s Normal

    • Most children begin potty training between 18 months and 3 years, but nighttime dryness comes later.
    • It’s completely normal for children to wet the bed at night well into their 4th or 5th year.
    • Many pediatricians consider bedwetting developmentally appropriate until age 5.

    🚩 When to Worry

    • Frequent daytime wetting alongside bedwetting.
    • Complaints of pain while urinating.
    • Regressive behavior after months of dry nights (especially if sudden or dramatic).

    💡 What to Do

    • Use absorbent night-time products to reduce laundry and stress.
    • Avoid punishment or shaming.
    • Limit fluids close to bedtime—but not excessively.
    • Establish a calm, predictable bedtime routine.
    • Praise dry nights casually; don’t pressure.

    Bedwetting in Early Primary School (Ages 6–8)

    ✅ What’s Normal

    • By age 6, most children are dry at night, but around 15–20% of kids still wet the bed.
    • Bedwetting at this age is often hereditary—if one or both parents wet the bed as children, their child has a 40–70% chance of doing the same.
    • Children may sleep very deeply and not register a full bladder.

    🚩 When to Worry

    • Your child is distressed by the bedwetting or refuses sleepovers.
    • You notice signs of urinary tract infections (UTIs).
    • Wetting is increasing in frequency rather than decreasing.

    💡 What to Do

    • Consider starting a bedwetting diary to track patterns.
    • Wake them for a “dream wee” (lifting at 10–11pm) to see if that helps.
    • Use washable mattress protectors or disposable bed mats.
    • Talk with your child openly—but keep the tone light and supportive.
    • Try reward charts for participation, not dryness.

    Bedwetting in Tweens (Ages 9–12)

    ✅ What’s Normal

    • About 5–10% of children still wet the bed at age 10.
    • It’s less common, but not rare—and not a reflection of laziness, maturity, or intelligence.
    • Children may feel intense embarrassment and fear being “found out” by peers.

    🚩 When to Worry

    • Wetting causes shame, anxiety, or avoidance of school trips and sleepovers.
    • You suspect constipation or bladder dysfunction.
    • The child has been dry for over 6 months and starts wetting again (secondary enuresis).

    💡 What to Do

    • Introduce bedwetting alarms—these can be highly effective in this age group with motivated children.
    • Involve your child in managing their routines (laying protection, helping with laundry, etc.).
    • Encourage them to empty their bladder twice before bed.
    • Talk to your GP if the issue persists or impacts confidence.
    • Normalize their experience—many kids feel alone, but they are not.

    Bedwetting in Teens (Ages 13–20)

    ✅ What’s Normal

    • Only about 1–2% of teens continue to wet the bed—but that still means thousands of teens in the UK alone.
    • Often, there’s a strong family history or a late-developing bladder.
    • Stress, sleep disorders, or untreated medical conditions can play a role.

    🚩 When to Worry

    • Wetting is frequent or worsening.
    • Your teen avoids relationships, travel, or hobbies out of fear.
    • They express feelings of self-hatred, depression, or worthlessness.
    • They are sneaking or hiding wet clothing or bedding.

    💡 What to Do

    • Speak with your GP—desmopressin or other treatments may be effective.
    • Explore discreet bedwetting underwear designed for teens (like SleepSecure™ Max).
    • Allow them total privacy in managing it.
    • Address emotional impacts—consider therapy if needed.
    • Emphasize their strengths and successes in other areas.

    What Causes Bedwetting at Any Age?

    • Genetics – The most common factor.
    • Deep sleep – Some kids sleep so deeply they don’t wake to bladder signals.
    • Delayed bladder maturation – Bladder may not hold urine overnight.
    • Constipation – Can press on the bladder.
    • Hormonal imbalance – Some kids don’t produce enough vasopressin at night.
    • Stress or anxiety – Especially true for secondary bedwetting.
    • Medical issues – Rare but include UTIs, diabetes, or neurological conditions.

    When Should You Seek Medical Help?

    Talk to a healthcare professional if:

    • Your child is over 7 and still bedwetting regularly.
    • You notice sudden changes after a period of dryness.
    • Your child seems in pain, unwell, or constipated.
    • Bedwetting is significantly impacting their wellbeing or mental health.

    A GP may:

    • Rule out medical causes.
    • Offer basic investigations.
    • Refer you to a continence clinic or pediatric urologist.
    • Recommend medication or alarms.

    How to Support Your Child Emotionally

    • Stay calm. Stay kind. Your reaction sets the tone.
    • Use matter-of-fact language. Avoid calling it “naughty” or “gross.”
    • Let them talk. If they want to. If not, don’t push it.
    • Protect their dignity. Never talk about it in front of others.
    • Praise effort, not outcomes. Celebrate participation in solutions, not just dry nights.

    Final Thoughts: Every Child is on Their Own Timeline

    Bedwetting isn’t a moral failing, a parenting failure, or a problem that always has a quick fix. It’s a developmental journey—one that many children will outgrow, and many families will weather successfully with the right knowledge, tools, and compassion.

    By understanding what’s normal by age and knowing when to seek help, you can confidently support your child and reduce stress for your whole family.